Have you ever been to the SAQ? It’s great! They stock all kinds of wine and liquor from all over the world at bargain prices. They have literally everything you can imagine of. They are open all the time with convenient schedules as long as you need booze before 6 p.m. most days. Visit your local SAQ now – who knows, they might have amazing promotions like 5% off a purchase of $275 or more. It’s great. Go buy alcohol.
Anyway here’s a list about girls.
1. The Hipster
She wears pants and hats and listens to music. Probably she is vegan aswell. This is by far the most common type of girl found in MTL – we do not understand them but they are OK to hook up with once in a while as long as they don’t talk about pants or hats or music. Like most MTL girls they are easy like Lionel Ritchie.
2. The fatty
Ugh. Gross. So much this. So much nope. Epic fail. Do not want. The struggle is real. Stop eating the poutines and bacon-stuffed mayonnaise donut BBQ sandwiches we promote every day, you gross fatty fatterson. Try a salad LOL.
3. The thuggette
She clubs a lot and listens to Drake. She thinks she is real hard but she is not. Sometimes she has grills or tats. While this kind of girl is good to have pictures of when you run a successful arts and culture website, it is not good to hang out with them. Turn down for nope.
4. The bookworm
She loves books so much, she will sometimes try to talk to you about books or even get you to read books. She even buys books and keeps them. LOL, only in MTL.
5. The drunk girl
She probably lives in the McGill ghetto. She is always throwing up or wtv or knocking on your door because she’s locked out of her house. Again, so much epic nope in a big way.
6. The douchette
If you do not knwo what this means, it means that you are a douchebag or probably dating one. LOL. Hope you enjoy it.
7. The spinster
This girl finished university at least one year ago and stuck around. She is desperate AF and hanging out in old person place like Else’s or Casa. Avoid at all costs unless you have a thing for MILFS or want to hear about the way it used to be in MTL (yuk).
8. The French girl
She’s all like ‘esti coliss’ and eating baguettes and cheese. Usually found in places you wouldn’t go anyway, but sometimes they’re sneaky as fuck and sign up for classes in real universities. Voulé vous couchez avec moi ce soire, indeed.
9. The unpaid intern
She is usually pretty great, has cool taste in things and is easily pliable. She will even write horseshit nonsense with scandalous titles because you asked her to. She’s an invaluable part of the team, and well worth her weight in exposure dollars.