“Opening Soon” Mile End Restaurant Is Now Ready To Open And Fall Out Of Business In Two Weeks

Things are heating up in the Mile End and in a good way! Yes! The things that are heating are meals! Food? Yum!

Located at 75 St-Viateur, in the heart of the Mile End district, Cantine Emilia has almost finished prepping the opening of it’s brand new restaurant and will very soon be ready to open up and fall out of business two weeks later!

Following last year’s successes of the previous 13 restaurants that made their home in this typically-Mile-End building, there will for sure be a lot of good cookery going on!

We tried to get a word from the person who seemed to be the owner of this new restaurant and who was on site as we walked by, but his long gray hair and levitating body quickly hid behind curtains when he saw us. The only words that we could get from were “It is alost finished. ha ha…. HA HA HA! IT IS ALMOST FINISHED!”

Share and like this article of journalism if you love FOOD!

Te Rest Of Me Going Be Disgusteng An Rany In Monreal


140623875 © Jerome Cid | Dreamstime.com

Today is rane an col wedder will keep going for Me. De rest of Me gray, rane, sad.

Hopes for nex weak because wedder netwark predic 32 mondae. Predic rane an col for wedder nex many dae.

Bad new for ale were lookeng to sumar like becik, voleybale, sangria an terase.

Is going to rane tru weak.

Wedder forecase:

Sans titre


Sai. Godbai.

Good source for wedder forecase ere! Like ane folow! An SHAYR

Montreal Decided To Open 99 Red Balloons Themed Biermarkt We Think

So we were on the Google internet

And we saw an image and we found after a deep investigation that Ho-Mama district (a.k.a. Hochelaga-Maisonneuve) himself has accepted Mother Montreal’s offer of opening a 99 Red Balloons themed Biermarkt!

Biermarkt is German for “a place that has beer and other things too”, so we are very excited. No confirmations on who will be the big names of the craft-beer world available at the place, but Chad says he thinks he remembers one but not for sure. One thing for sure though — there WILL be balloons!

Make sure to check this place in the near future! BRA 99 Biermarkt is located somewhere close to Pie IX Daily Metro Station.

We’ll call BRA 99 eventually to make sure this information is true. In the meantime, suck it.


Montreal Opens First-Ever Curry Bar For Real This Time

Montreal is quite the entrapranoor, nowadays! We’ve witnessed a quite impressive amount of bars, restaurants and stores OFFICIALLY opened by Montreal herself! How inspiring!

Now it’s Hochelaga‘s turn to have a taste of Montreal’s great ideas. Located on Ontario Street, in the heart of the heart-warming district also dubbed as “HOMAMA“, Boustan has officially opened its doors for the whole world to have a taste of the FIRST-EVER Indian-Curry-Themed experience! Yummy!


Yummy yummy rollin’ tummy! Photo source: Boustan

Get your chopsticks ready, my bros (and also girls)! Indian-Curry-Themed restaurants are known to be spicy, or something! We don’t know. It’s not like we checked. Leave us the fuck alone! We took the info off Google Reviews! We usually require people to sign legal papers for sole proprietorship of their kidneys for us to make such a nice article! People by the GADJILLIONS click on our links. Eat shit, poors!

MTLGamer Review: MTL-made Farcry 4

Do you game? Do you g33k? Are you the ultimate cyber-warlord (LOL)? Boy, do we have a treat for you! Turns out newest intern’s friend has a Nentendo at home and he wanted to write a review for MTL’s very-own Farcry 4 from Ubisoft MTL!

Farcry 4 is a game much like Mario Party was a game too. It uses a controler-pad to direct the character, there is land where he walks on and the character you play can also jump! It gets pretty awesome as soon as you start the game, because there is a 10 minute-short movie. The movie is about a man in a bus and his old friend finds him. It’s like Big Bang Theory (BEST TV SHOW) but it’s outside and it’s got guns and it’s in India and there’s a man who gets stabbed with a pen. Ouch!

After the short movie, you are left in a house and you have to escape. This part was really difficult because I could not jump off the balcony. I tried and tried for maybe an hour and nothing worked. I don’t know the right manoevers for this, apparently. Luckily, I was told it’s a world that’s open kinda-game; there are many ways to do whatever you want! So I walked down some stairs, got scared and when I was outside, I was having a panic-attack so I had no idea what to do and I died many many times and I cried because it was violent. This game is HARD. But some people like hard games. I’m a geek and I like Big Bang Theory so I like this game too.

Source www.forbes.com Thats cute mankey! He dies after.

Source http://www.forbes.com
Thats cute mankey! He dies after.

After my friend played for two hours, I was given the controler back. The game was STILL hard because some buttons make grenades appear and I had to dodge them but the camera kept spinning because I didn’t know how to play. After two days of practice, I was finally able to play the proper way and I went into a car and I was looking at the beautiful birds in the sky over the lake and I ran over a man and fell in the lake. I had no idea what button I pressed so I couldn’t get out of the car either, it was a really stressful moment and I tend to faint when things get too stressful.

When I regained consciousness, my character was back on land and he wasn’t in a car anymore — gee, what a relief!

This game is good because A LOT of people like it. I like being a video-game cridic because I never do anything and I was doing something. I give it 5 thumbs up!