Te Rest Of Me Going Be Disgusteng An Rany In Monreal

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140623875 © Jerome Cid | Dreamstime.com

Today is rane an col wedder will keep going for Me. De rest of Me gray, rane, sad.

Hopes for nex weak because wedder netwark predic 32 mondae. Predic rane an col for wedder nex many dae.

Bad new for ale were lookeng to sumar like becik, voleybale, sangria an terase.

Is going to rane tru weak.

Wedder forecase:

Sans titre

Unfortunate.

Sai. Godbai.

Good source for wedder forecase ere! Like ane folow! An SHAYR

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Montreal Decided To Open 99 Red Balloons Themed Biermarkt We Think

So we were on the Google internet

And we saw an image and we found after a deep investigation that Ho-Mama district (a.k.a. Hochelaga-Maisonneuve) himself has accepted Mother Montreal’s offer of opening a 99 Red Balloons themed Biermarkt!

Biermarkt is German for “a place that has beer and other things too”, so we are very excited. No confirmations on who will be the big names of the craft-beer world available at the place, but Chad says he thinks he remembers one but not for sure. One thing for sure though — there WILL be balloons!

Make sure to check this place in the near future! BRA 99 Biermarkt is located somewhere close to Pie IX Daily Metro Station.

We’ll call BRA 99 eventually to make sure this information is true. In the meantime, suck it.

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Montreal Opens First-Ever Curry Bar For Real This Time

Montreal is quite the entrapranoor, nowadays! We’ve witnessed a quite impressive amount of bars, restaurants and stores OFFICIALLY opened by Montreal herself! How inspiring!

Now it’s Hochelaga‘s turn to have a taste of Montreal’s great ideas. Located on Ontario Street, in the heart of the heart-warming district also dubbed as “HOMAMA“, Boustan has officially opened its doors for the whole world to have a taste of the FIRST-EVER Indian-Curry-Themed experience! Yummy!

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Yummy yummy rollin’ tummy! Photo source: Boustan

Get your chopsticks ready, my bros (and also girls)! Indian-Curry-Themed restaurants are known to be spicy, or something! We don’t know. It’s not like we checked. Leave us the fuck alone! We took the info off Google Reviews! We usually require people to sign legal papers for sole proprietorship of their kidneys for us to make such a nice article! People by the GADJILLIONS click on our links. Eat shit, poors!

12 Signs You’re A Born And Bread MTLer

It’s pretty obvi at this point that MTL is hella tight (if not the tightest). There’s alot of great stuff: poutine, festivals, hockey, bars, bagels. You should really know the drill by now so that I don’t have to wright this stuff down every time. But most of us are not from here and did not grow up with these amazing mindblowing elements of life. But some of us did. Here’s how to know if you’re born and bred a Montrealer.

1. You were born in a hospital within the confines of the City of Montreal.

(Source: blogspot.com)

(Source: blogspot.com)

2. On the piece of official paper that denotes that you were born (sometimes called certificate of birth or birth certificate), it says ‘Montreal’ under birthplace.

3. Once your parents took you out of the hospital and brought you home, it was to a home located within the confines of Montreal.

(Source: facebook.com)

(Source: facebook.com)

4. As a toddler, you did most of your toddling within the confines of the city of Montreal, leaving only for vacations.

(Source: wikipedia.org)

(Source: wikipedia.org)

5. Once you went to school, it was at a school located within the confines of the city of Montreal. (Boarding school in Stanstead still counts according to an unofficially office poll show of hands.)

6. Throughout your teenage years, you spent the majority of your time in Montreal.

(Source: montrealgazette.com)

(Source: montrealgazette.com)

7. When you went away on a Eurotrip (inspired by the best movie ever, Eurotrip) to find yourself in CEGEP, you told people that you met you were from Montreal. (‘It’s near Toronto’, while not very MTL of you, is acceptable because not untrue.)

(Source: manaboutmtl.com)

(Source: manaboutmtl.com)

8. When you returned, you continued to live in Montreal for the majority of the year, not counting the time you worked at a summer camp in Maine.

(Source: nasdaq.com)

(Source: nasdaq.com)

9. When you’re reading this, you say ‘Yes, this is true.’

10. POUTINE

(Source: LOL its right there common)

11. DRUNK SLUTS

(Source: fairmountbagels.com)

(Source: fairmountbagels.com)

12. BAGELS