Walking is great. Driving is even better, particularly if you’re driving a brand new BMW M4 Coupé! You should buy a BMW! Buy one! BUY ONE! COUPÉ! M4! WOW! Why walk, you peddler fuck-tard!? Drive! Buy a BMW with dad’s money.
If you do walk tho, you’ll most probably hear these 5 sentences, every now and then. If you relate to this article, don’t forget to violently spam your friend’s Facebook newsfeed!
This phrase is frequently heard in MTL. The French alternative to “Hi” is “Saloo“, which you might hear as frequently.
3: “Oh that’s cray!”
This phrase is most commonly heard at the mad parties we go to. If you see Chad party, you won’t even be able to control your mouth! You’ll instantly scream “Oh, that’s crayyy!!! I gotta gets me a BMW and then a poutine at LE BANQUISE!!”
2: “If you’re a real MTL-man you’ll drink Smirnoff Vodka”
Smirnoff makes quality products, such as Vodka and Vodka-flavored Vodka. Real MTL-men have long lumberjack beards, wear suspenders, have jail-tats that go up to their necks and drink Vodka — and the best kind of Vodka is Smirnoff’s smooth WOW-inducing Vodka.
1: “YO!!! STANLEY CUP, BRAH!!! Let’s go get turnt at La Boom!”
Besides from having amazing Smirnoff Vodka-flavored drinks, La Boom also has GIANT TV screens (we think). (We think) you‘ll be able to watch the MTLPKSUBBAN-Habs win all the matches while your sweet–ass BMW is parked outside in front of the club, impressing all tha ladies!