It’s pretty obvi at this point that MTL is hella tight (if not the tightest). There’s alot of great stuff: poutine, festivals, hockey, bars, bagels. You should really know the drill by now so that I don’t have to wright this stuff down every time. But most of us are not from here and did not grow up with these amazing mindblowing elements of life. But some of us did. Here’s how to know if you’re born and bred a Montrealer.
1. You were born in a hospital within the confines of the City of Montreal.
2. On the piece of official paper that denotes that you were born (sometimes called certificate of birth or birth certificate), it says ‘Montreal’ under birthplace.
3. Once your parents took you out of the hospital and brought you home, it was to a home located within the confines of Montreal.
4. As a toddler, you did most of your toddling within the confines of the city of Montreal, leaving only for vacations.
5. Once you went to school, it was at a school located within the confines of the city of Montreal. (Boarding school in Stanstead still counts according to an unofficially office poll show of hands.)
6. Throughout your teenage years, you spent the majority of your time in Montreal.
7. When you went away on a Eurotrip (inspired by the best movie ever, Eurotrip) to find yourself in CEGEP, you told people that you met you were from Montreal. (‘It’s near Toronto’, while not very MTL of you, is acceptable because not untrue.)
8. When you returned, you continued to live in Montreal for the majority of the year, not counting the time you worked at a summer camp in Maine.
9. When you’re reading this, you say ‘Yes, this is true.’
11. DRUNK SLUTS