BlogMTL Does Fantasia Part One!

Here at BlogMTL we looooooooooove scary movies: Paranormal Activity, Paranormal Activity 2, Paranormal Activity 3, Saw, Saw II, Saw III, Saw V, Saw VIII, and the list goes on! That’s why we love Fantasia so much: it’s a film festival full of scary movies to make us ponder the existance of monsters and such. So we sent a couple of movie reviewers to go see some scary movies and report back.

boyhood

Boyhood

I thought this was going to be a very scary film with a scary child in it like The Ring or Bride of Chucky, but I was very disappointed. It’s mostly about this kid and his life with his dad (Ethan Hawk from Training Day) and his mom (Rosanna Arquette from Little Nicky) over many years. It’s pretty boring – there isn’t a lot of plot or scary things happen, but the makeup is pretty good because they manage to make this kid look older and older in the movie. That’s a lot of makeup to put on a six year old! Also this movie is very, very long so if you want to see scary children I would recommend that you watch The Grudge or the TV show Rosemarie’s Baby instead. 3/10

lifeafterbeth

Life After Beth

Life After Beth is a movie about Beth (Audrey Plaza) who dies and comes back to life, later becomes a zombie. Her boyfriend (Daniel Dahann from the new Spider-Man movie) tries to be her boyfriend again, but it’s hard because she’s a zombie. I think many young people will relate to this story of heartbreak because even though most of us never had a zombie girlfriend or even one that died, heartbreak is common among people of our age. The actors are very good at acting and give convincing dialogs but overall a very sad and emotional movie. 9/10

zombeavers

Zombeavers

Actually this movie was sold out so I’ll review the trailer. These kids go on a vacation and there’s killer beavers (LOL) that eat them? So random! This is one of those movies that is so bad it’s actually good, you know? Like they obviously had no idea that beavers aren’t scary at all and are not good horror movie monsters AT ALL, so it’s fun to go see this movie to laugh at it but not to be scared. I think that the producers are pretty stupid not realize how dumb their idea is but at least you can make fun of how random it is. That’s how I would feel if I had seen it, anyway. 0/10

openwindows

Open Windows

Open Windows is a movie set entirely over the Internet and it has Bilbo Baggins from LOTR in it as well as pornographic star Sacha Gray in it. This is a very original concept because we’ve never seen a movie set in the Internet before even though we are a hugely popular blog that is in itself a part of the Internet in itself. Anyway, this is a very exciting film but also very unrealistic – they invent some cameras and other such things. Sacha Grey doesn’t get totally nudeballs in it either but I’m sure if you Google her you will find something. 5/10

intheland

In the Land of the Head Hunters

This sounded cool from the title but I went to see it and it was hella fuckin’ old, there wasn’t even any talking in it. Why the fuck do we want to see that, LOL, it’s 2014. 0/10

thesuspect

The Suspect

There are a lot of Chinese movies at Fantasia and this is one of them. I don’t like to read subtitles when I go to the movies (it’s so hard to concentrate) but this looked pretty cool with lots of guys in suits and ties shooting guns. I am happy to report that it was exactly that, but I still had to read subtitles so I’m docking it 3 points. 7/10

In conclusion, Fantasia so far this year isn’t very scary but there are some OK movies. Let’s hope it gets scarier!

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