Why not treat your beh to some SO SO MTL gifts? The city is full of them.
11. This shirt
This is very delightful because your bae is a rowdy kinda girl. PS: if your bae is a dude, I’m sure there’s an equivalent shirt as well but whatever (gender is a construct LOL).
10. Schwartz’s frozen meat box
Right, so, ideally, the best case scenario would be you’d wait in line 30 minutes with a bunch of American tourists and your bae, then you and your bae would eat smoked meat together. But maybe your bae doesn’t live in MTL (which is so not MTL) or even worse they live in Ville Saint-Laurent (definitely not MTL), so you can just pick up this Celine Dijon-approved box and enjoy it in the comfort of you and/or your bae’s home. It tastes exactly the same.
9. TEDDY BAER
EVERYONE LOVE TEDDY BAER.
8. Orange cone
No one really knows what these are – a mushroom, maybe? Either way they are super plentiful in Montreal (you’ll find them nearly everywhere!) and make great decorations for your bae’s living space.
Adopt-a-Pigeon is an organism that feeds old dirty garbage to Montreal pigeons who cannot find old dirty garbae by themselves. It’s a fun and stress-free way to pretend to own something without actually having to do anything. Your bae will love the attention and the complete lack of responsibility it requires.
6. Cool Taxi coupons
Being broke as fuck is VERY MTL and walking halfway across town at closing time is also very MTL – but if you want to treat your bae, why not get said bae a bunch of Cool Taxi coupons? They’re practical, easy to lose and worth exactly the same as money!
5. BBQ Panini
Honestly, I don’t know why I have to say it again. BBQ Panini is an AMAZING MTL invention and your bae is clearly not enjoying life to the fullest if they don’t have this amazing contraption and the BBQ (Bae Bae Queue LOL) that it fits over. It will change you life and you sandwich-eating habits forever.
You don’t have to spend a lot of money to treat your bae. Montreal baegels are cheap (anywhere between 19 cents to 7.42$), the baegal places are always open and best of all they keep for close to 12 hours before becoming rock-hard and useless and denting your garbage can! Your bae will love ’em.
3. Tickets to the newest Christian Bae movie
Boys love him, girls love him, moms love him and his accessible films for all ages. No matter the shape, size or smell of your bae, you can spend some quality time with your favorite movie star at one of MTL’s numerous movie theaters.
2. A heart felt poem
Baes love poems. It’s a known fact. Use this hand guide to compose a poem for any kind of bae possible:
Pretty ____, pretty ______, pretty _____, you should be smiling
A ____ like you should never look so ____
You’re everything I see in my _____
I wouldn’t say that to ____ if it wasn’t _____
1. Spa treatment things
Everyone loves these! Just make sure your bae lets everyone know they’re going to the spa on Facebook at like 6 in the morning and that they chronicle every step of their soujourn there, or else it’s a shit gift! Hae bae bae, SPA DAE!